I just got home and I’m exhausted from (a) not sleeping last night and (b) the Valium I had to take because of the painfulness of today’s procedures. I’m going to give a quick sum but there’s so much to get into sorry if this doesn’t make sense or if I leave things out.
First, we did an ultrasound and also a trans-vaginal ultrasound (where they, in fact, do it internally. And yes, it’s as fun as it sounds.) First off the tech had never in all her years seen a uterus as bad and full of tumors as mine for someone my age – ever. Awesome. The ultrasounds showed the masses equate in total to the size of a basketball. I have more then they realized including several SOFTBALL sized ones, and several BASEBALL sized ones. Let me say that again: total mass of a basketball.
So, my uterus and the tumors are just too damned big. Technically, we can operate with them right now…but it’s high risk. We’d be looking at 4+ hours of anesthesia and most likely several pints of blood transfusion due to the bleeding of the procedure. He’d be looking at taking the uterus out in about a DOZEN pieces rather than 3-4 that’s normal. At 250grams it’s considered high risk. Mine is 4 times that. I have pounds literally of tumors.
We also did the biopsy where they took some cells from the lining of my uterus. (Which, holy shit, hurts. I have killer cramps right now.)
And we have a new course of action we need to take as a result of things being even worse then we thought. Tuesday I go in for a shot. It’s $1,000 but the doctor is going to donate it to me. (SO nice of him.) The shot will give me about 2 weeks of a heavy period, but then put me in medical menopause. Oh yes. Hot flashes, night sweats – the whole deal. It’s NOT permanent though. Afterward, I will go back to normal and won’t go through real menopause until I’m ready in 10-15 years give-or-take.
The shot will shrink the tumors. And shrink the overall size of my uterus so it’s more manageable so the surgery has less risks. It just means a really unfun few months. Though he says that after the first couple weeks, the pain should actually decrease since the tumors will decrease and it will be causing less pressure like it is now. But I will be dealing with what is basically all the symptoms of menopause as well in the meantime!
The surgery is just too risky right now with the state of my uterus and my fibroids. They’re just too damned big. The upside is this gives us more time to raise the money. The downside of course is, um, hello? Menopause. But it’s not permanent. It will stop once the medication is out of my system.
I’m just….shocked right now. This is definitely not what I thought I’d hear. But once they looked again at my uterus, they found more. And more that were MUCH larger then initially believed. Holy shit, how much of this can I have in my body?? Jeez, no wonder I wound up in the ER in full-on crying/screaming/desperate pain!
I need time to decompress. I have an appointment Tuesday morning for the shot. I most likely won’t be able to work next week because of the effects of the shot. I have a note for this week and next from the doctor. After that…it’s a matter of how I manage the “menopause” symptoms I guess. Right now though, I think I just need to lay down and tune out for a bit. My whole world feels like it’s spinning off it’s axis.