So it finally happened. Knew it was going to eventually...just thought that I'd be able to get away with it. I've posted it before, but for anyone who doesn't know, my license is expired. It has been since my birthday (May 16th)...of last year. Yes, it expired 5/16/2000. Why have I not gone and renewed it? Well...my eyesite is just slightly bad enough that I can't pass the eye test. (I can't see distance things like I used to - last time I had my eyes checked I was like 12. My vision was 20/05 ! That's so much better then the "perfect" of 20/20 that it meant I could see anything I wanted, to any distance.) Now though...well, it's just gotten all soft and blurry. Which pisses me off since my Mom didn't need glasses until she was like 50 and even then, only for reading. Grr. Damn eyes. So...I never had the money for glasses and I've never had vision insurance, so it's just been put off and put off and put off. I kept saying that as soon as I had the money, I'd get it done...just go bite the bullet and get a pair of glasses so I could pass the eye test you have to take upon license renewal. But, it's just been one thing after another with me, my health, my jobs, my relationship, my car, my bills, my cat, etc that I've never had that much money at once to get it done. (nor have I had the money to put aside and save up to it) In the meantime, I just kept doing what I had to do which included driving several hours (and a couple hundred miles) a week to jobs, to Gainesville, to everything all the while with a useless piece of plastic where my valid license should be.

This brings us to Thursday. I had gone over to my friend's house to use his RoadRunner and his fax machine to send out some resumes. I'm on my way back, having just gotten off the phone (I have an interview this Thursday!) and all of about a mile from my apt when a white car moves over from the middle lane to the right lane behind me and turns on it's lights. This is the point at which I just about throw up. I'm shaking and trembling as I move to pull over... see, not only is my license expired, but all this summer (since I've not been able to get a job) I've had no insurance on my car. I know I'm just fucked at this point and I am pretty much crying when he comes to the window. He says he ran my tags and it said the registered owner of the car had no valid license. I swallow, look at him and nod. He asks for my license and registration - but NOT my insurance! - and I hand them to him. He sees my license and says, "This says it's expired too." I start just babbling at him...words spilling out how I just barely can't pass the test, how I've had the worst of times, that I lost my job, was sick, my boyfriend had broken up with me, I lost my apartment, how I had to move in with my family and how I've just not had enough money to get to the eye doctor. I take a shuddering breath and he gives me this sad, sad look and says how he's sorry this all happened but that while he believes me and would like to just let me go, he'd have to explain to a judge why he let someone with a license expired 1 1/2 years go with a citation. I say I understand...still teary eyed and scared. He says that what's going to happen is that he's got to write me a ticket, that this is technically a criminal offense - he could take me to jail right then and there - and I'll have to see a judge and talk to them and explain why I've been unable to get this done. He says it will be up to the Judge to decide what my fine and/or community service will be but that if I can bring paperwork or friends with me to support the problems I've had, that it problably won't be so bad. He tells me to sit tight and goes back to his car. When he comes back with the ticket, he tells me that technically, he's supposed to take my license from me as well, but that since it's probably my only form of ID (which it is) he's not going to compound my problem. All-in-all he was really nice and I got off really easy, but....

Now I can't drive at all. Problem is that while yes, I did drive for a year and a half without problem, since I've already been caught and assigned a court date, if I'm pulled over again, they can not only give me another court date, but the cop doesn't have to be as nice and could do anything from cite me for no insurance to take me to jail. This is bad because I have an interview on Thursday of this week and I NEED to go to it, but am terrified of being pulled over again. You know how it is, once you're "tagged" that's it - it's like blood in the water for sharks. They just find you over and over. Grr..... Today, the only reason I'm here at all is that my friend drove over to pick me up. Otherwise, I'd not have been able to come over. *sigh* What else is bad is that the date he gave me was October 20th. In case you don't have a calander around, that's a Saturday. They don't have court on Saturdays. So when I called the clerk of the court, they said I'd have to wait like 5-10 days for them to get the paperwork from the Officer, process it, and issue me a new date. I told her that there's now way I want to miss my date if they change it and I don't know the new date, because if you miss it, they issue you a warrent for your arrest. She assured me that they would make it for sometime after the date the Officer assigned, but still...we're talking about jail here! I've never been and have no plans on starting now. Dammit, I'm terrified of small spaces and that would just kill me. So NO...I don't want to piss off the County any more.

But! The good news is that my friend Joolo has offered to give me the money to get my eyes checked and buy me some glasses. It's not that he has the money to do it, but he knows how important this is and how much I've had to borrow money from so many other people already that I just can't borrow any more. We're looking to go probably tomorrow, so hopefully I can get my license renewed not only before my whenever-they-decide-to-make-it court date, but also before my interview Thursday. (one down anyway...only insurance to go...) Also, my Love's mom actually does optical stuff for a living and is going to see how much it will be for me to get frames through her. (They get a large discount off the "retail" price). Yesterday, I stopped in an eye place in the mall and tried on frames ("No, I don't need help...") I found two I liked and gave the item information to her so she can check the price difference for me. *fingers crossed* I hope it's cheap enough that poor Joolo isn't out more then a hundred or so bucks. It's nice of him to do this for me at all and I certainly don't want to take every penny he's got this week...

Let's see...what else...? Well...not much really. Just been sitting around, bored, broke, and getting pretty desperate throughout it all. Except for the fact that I was just offered what amounts to "stale toast" by my friend Rand. Um, that's going to be a no...don't ask, it's some weird Dutch thing apparently. *smirks* Well, my Love, Rand, and I went out to eat yesterday and all ended up sick last night (and still with a rather unhappy stomach today). We think it must have been the Stake N Shake since we all ate it and all puked that night. Joy... it's the only reason he was able to come and pick me up anyway, he took off work from being sick all night. I hate food poisoning....I hate upset stomachs and I HATE puking. Luckily, my natural do-anything-to-keep-from-puking talent meant I didn't barf, but I've been having horrible stomach pains and other fun stuff like that. (more then you needed to know I'm sure)

Boy, I remember as I was falling asleep last night thinking of the things that I was going to include in my journal when I next wrote it but how I also NEVER remember anything the next day that I think about in those times. It sucks. So, since that's about all I can think of, I'll close for now. Need to get to faxing stuff anyway...take care all and be well. (and no puking)

~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream at 10/8/2001 02:56:35 PM ~ ~