Is it still a cold when it’s hot out? This week has seen me on assignment at a Physical Therapist’s office - the place from which my journal entry was made the other day - but…the place that is also infested with a nasty cold/flu bug going around. One that I caught. One that made me miss Tuesday and today. (Made it in yesterday, didn’t feel that well, but the office was so slow that they sent me home at like 2pm since there were no patients scheduled until 4pm {and I get off at 5}) Lucky for me, I didn’t get the down-and-out sickness that seemed to run amuck with the rest of the ladies there, but I did end up with the tired/achy/sore/stuffed-up head/can’t sleep worth a damn kinda sickness. Just enough to feel like shit, not really enough to seem sick. The good thing is that since everyone there was sick as well, they didn’t think it was a big deal that I called in. (my recruiter was actually apologetic on the phone when I called saying she was sorry she got me in there just in time to get sick!) It was nice not to feel bad about feeling bad…
--little…break…8:46pm-
Silly ideas while daydreaming I just had this silly thought. There’s some show on UPN in the background (we don’t have cable yet, so there’s not many channels we can pull even with an “amplifying antenna” aka plug-in rabbit ears) where these ladies just rob a bank. Made me get an idea that money should have unique bar codes on it like grocery items. Banks could scan the bar codes whenever they get money in and when you spend it, they would scan it as well. This way, you’d always be able to track stolen money…also, you could scan the contents of your wallet and verify when you lose it how much was in there and things like that. I bet that’d be a major hindrance to money theft since there would be so many ways to get caught with money that’s not yours. Ever get an idea you’re sure is a good one then wonder how you could make it into something real and make money off it? But you’re afraid to tell people about it because they could steal it and you’d get squat, and in the meantime your great idea doesn’t get anywhere? Sucks. It’s about $1400 for a patent I think and there’s tons of paperwork to fill out and that’s pending that you can even finalize the details enough that you’d have a working model. Some things I think of I don’t have the technical/mechanical/scientific means to make it in real life, but I know it would work. How do you go about finding someone to take you seriously without taking your idea in the first place? You get into lawyers (the bane of existence) and legalities and things get so complicated (not to mention expensive up front with no promise of being able to reap any reward later) that you just say, “Never mind!” and there goes that idea. Sucks, doesn’t it?
See you, see me? I was in BestBuy today drooling over some PC items. I’d love to upgrade my PC (it’s a PII-266 w/128 megs of RAM) but…that’s an expensive undertaking right now. What’s not as an expensive undertaking is a web cam. I’m convinced that I REALLY want one. I just think how cool it could be to include all sorts of pics of me, pics of things that I’m talking about in my journal, pics of anything I want…I admit it, I’m a ham. I’d be more then happy to sit at my pc and do things “live” on webcam. (but no…I don’t mean ‘naughty’ things, that’s why it’s called a personal life), but I do mean being able to wave to people in chat, or other such things. Have a M’s Pic with my M’s Mood. It’d be so cool. I just can’t afford one right now (hell, if I had the cash I’d be online first and getting my domain second), but man would that be great. Anyone who happens to have an extra one can drop me a note if they don’t mind parting with it - webmaster@memoryanddream.zzn.com - I’d be soooo grateful. (I miss my sister’s…it was too cool) That being said, anyone having anything they wish to contribute towards the site that they don’t want to do via credit card (see the link to PayPal for credit/check/bank fund donations) can also contact me. I DO need to get a domain registered and money to host it before December. (Yes, my dear friend Orb said she’d host it on her domain, but she’s already running really tight on her bandwidth and I’d hate to impose…it’s GREAT to know that it’s an option if all else fails, but…I’d really rather not have to make things more difficult on her.) Anyway, just reminded me that time’s starting to get short and I’m starting to panic. *nervous laugh*
Needing a fix Gods I miss the net. I swear I thought that it’d get easier the longer I didn’t have it at home. I was so very, very wrong. It just gets worse. I swear I’m getting to a point where I sit and daydream about the things I could be doing if only I were online. Jeez…it’s bad. Then again, you have to understand that for three years I had a cable modem which let me be connected 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year! It was just ALWAYS there. ARG! I’m such a junkie I’m typing this from home, waiting on a phone call from a friend to see if he’s home if I can come over on a Friday night to check in on my forum, publish this entry, read up on my friends’ journals, and generally be online. *sigh* I’m so needy for the net it’s sad. I could have RoadRunner again too if it weren’t for the fact that they say I owe then $220 from my last apt. (I can’t turn on new service until I pay the remainder of the old). Dammit, not only do I not have $220, but they’re trying to charge me for an extra month and I really only owe them $110. (not that I have $110 either) *sigh* again.
Yeah! My cell phone rang…my friend is on the line with me as I type this. Maybe I can get some internet time afterall! Whoo hoo! Let’s hope this gets published tonight…either way, I’m going to close. Hope everyone is well - and not sick like I was - and remember, you’re always welcome to leave me feedback. I like feeling like someone’s listening! *smiles*
...by the way folks...just in case anyone noticed (ie: as in my feedback) M is not the finest speller in the world and although I try to ensure there are as few errors as possible, my internet time is so very limited (as in minutes a week) that proofreading is a luxury I don't have time for...
Just an entry I wrote earlier today...the other computer apparently has net access and the lady said that since it's dead quite in here I was welcomed to come on. Figured that I don't have much time, but enough to get this up anyway...
9/25/01 @ 1:33PM Happy Tuesday...today finds me at a very klunky (and hard to type with) keyboard in a physical therapy office. I'm temping in for the next week or two at a whopping $8/hr answering phones, scheduling appointments, and collecting patient co-payments. General boring things like that. (have I mentioned how much this keyboard stinks?? The buttons all stick so you have to pound them into submission!)
I've been faxing out resumes like mad and yet I am still not hearing anything back...it's getting frustrating. It seems like I've been struggling forever trying to find a permanent position. It really gets on you - you start to take it personal that no one wants to hire you. I start asking myself what's wrong with me? Why am I the one that no one calls? Why won't they even meet with me for an interview? There's an HR manager's wet dream on my resume - every skill and software proficency that you'd ever want - so why don't they do themselves a favor and at least call me for more information?? I just don't get it. My phone just does not ring...and when I'm faced with thousands of dollars of past due bills (not to mention the stress it causes me and my relationship) I have to wonder what I'm doing wrong...
Happy subject, eh? As you can tell, it's a bit slow in here right now, so I'm typing this up on Word Pad... (this pc is running win95 and certainly feels old) I'm so spoiled by cutting edge technology when it comes to computers. My Love works with PC's for a living and so does my friend Rand. Joolo just loves how much fun stuff you can do with them and I love everything, so between us all, there's always some new PC (or PC-related) toy to explore. It's funny because everyone here is like, "I'm pc illiterate" and it's funny, but I can't even imagine. I can't fathom NOT embracing all the wonders of computers. Maybe it's just me and the way that I like to do things, but I find that there's always something new to do or learn or explore on a computer...
Even More of a Redhead? So, I was in the supermarket with my Love the other day and I was looking longingly at the hair dye. The burgandy has really faded out and my hair is mostly an redish brown again. It's nothing special though and instead looks rather dull. So I ask him if he thinks I should do my hair again and he says, "Yeah, but not the same color" Turns out that he did not like the burgandy shade last time because it made my hair too dark and not enough red. (He said it just made it darker and in light, more purple) So I asked him what color he'd like to see. He picked this Cinnamon color that's lighter and reder (but not orangy or anything) I've been dying to do it, but since it's not been three months, I can't do the full color process. But, since it's a lighter shade, I'm afraid that if I do the "touch-up" process that it won't really lighten the ends and I'll wind up with a red head and brown strainds...not the look I'm shooting for. So I've been trying to wait the three months (Which will be October 14th). My Love keeps asking me if I'm going to ever dye my hair - I think he's more eager then I am to see it in that color. I don't know why I mentioned it other then I'm overly anxious to do it but I want to do it right. Since this will only be the second time I've ever dyed it, I don't want to screw up and I'm trying to play by the rules so to speak. Anyone with any suggestions how to do this without killing my hair further (it's so very dead these days) is welcomed to drop a note in Feedback...
Tag! You're it! I've been playing phone tag with a recruiter for like a week now. After leaving me a long and rambling message, she thought to finally include her cell phone number. Excusing myself for a moment, I grabbed my cell and rang her back. She wants to meet with me and register me with them because she says she has several things that she wants to send me on interviews for. Hey, rock on. I'm all for recruiters calling me...I don't pay anything, they hunt like mad for you (since they get paid based on commission), and because they generally get with good, solid companies (little ones won't pay the fees). Only problem is that I am on this assignment this week from 8am to 5pm and she's a good 45 minute drive away working the same hours. Hrm.... *thinking* I need to get off early one of these days to go down there and meet with her. (At this point, I could so desperately use some decent sized paychecks) Oh the stresses of trying to schedule and find a REAL job while trying to keep some trickle of income coming in... (damn day hours - everyone works the same so it's like one or the other!)
Let me close for now. I don't know how much longer before the other people come back from lunch and I'd hate to have done something wrong by my typing here. I don't know when I'll get to pulish this but at least there's no re-typing it from hand! (yeah!)
Ok, first off people....if anyone reading this has a problem with the content of the SITE and/or the FORUM, please don't leave your comments here about it...this is my JOURNAL and is not the place to rant about how much you disagree with DDD. In case the REALLY obvious color scheme difference, the different title, and totally different content didn't clue you in, let me make it clear that my journal is NOT DDD...it's just by the same person who Admins DDD. Leave your comments and thoughts on the DDD guestbook, not in my journal's feedback!
Grr..
Anyway...let's see. Well, last Friday was supposed to be my last day at the Mental Health Center, but most of the West Coast of Florida (and most of Central Florida as well) was under a tornado warning/hurricane watch. Having moved in with my Love already, I was a good 45 minutes from work...the agency that I was working through did not open until 8am and I was supposed to be on assignement at 8am. All the schools for four counties were closed and it was nasty out. Problem...so, I called them, left a message asking them to call me ASAP to let me know what to do about the assignement. In the meantime, I hoped in my car and hoped for the best. (I figured that I'd do the right thing and at least try to make it in there since I had not heard otherwise). With downpour of rain and winds gusting 35-45mph, I began my drive. It was about 8am and I was about 10 miles away still (but closer there then home by far!) when my cell phone rang...it was the agency telling me that they were closed and that I needed not show up. Arg!! So, I had to turn around and drive back into the worsening storm to get back home. All told, almost and hour and a half of driving when I should have just stayed in bed and not bothered. Hate when I try to do the right thing and the lazy thing was the better route...
Hrm...beyond that...haven't gotten anything else (though I've been on a second interview that I was sure I nailed, but as days pass and no call, perhaps not) and am dealing with the stupidity of said agency when trying to get two weeks worth of checks needed to pay my car payment (that whole pesky don't-pay-they-repo thing). The long and short of it is that I was supposed to get a check two weeks ago and another last week for my final two weeks at the Mental place. Neither has shown up. They make you wait 10 days before they'll reissue you a check and despite the fact that I only have until close of business TODAY to make my car payment (that was due Saturday the 22nd, but was extended through today because of a lot of begging and some crying) the agency says that there's no guarentee that they'll have the check today and that it's coming from their Dallas office so...well, they're doing their best. Hello?! You've known for two weeks that the check was lost, that I had not gotten it, that I sorta NEEDED it (correct me if I'm wrong, but don't most people work because they actually need the paycheck to pay bills?) and that I had to technically wait until the 24th to get a duplicate? So then, why are you telling me that you'll just now START the paperwork process and that it may be another couple days before I get the duplicate?? GRRR...so, my friend has yet again come to the rescue...tacking on another $342 to the massive amount I've already borrowed from him just to ensure that the payment gets in today and that whenever they decide to give me the check, I'll pay him back. *sighs* Why is it that just when things are hard enough, they get that much more difficult?
Let's see....beyond this unending nightmare, my Love and I made a great purchase a couple weekends ago...a fondue pot. Mmmm..see, I love going out to eat at this place called Melting Pot (a fondue resturant) but it's a big more expensive then eating out at Chilli's or something. Add to the fact that it's a good 2-3 hours of actual eating time (the three courses, the cooking, etc.) it's hard to go there often. So, for a whopping $20 at Target we got ourselves a cool ass fondue pot to make it at home. And let me tell you what, it's GREAT! *grins* All the yumminess of fondue, all the comforts of your living room. It rocks. Best damn $20 I've spent in a long time.
What else...? Well, on a personal, spiritual level, I've come to the conclusion that I'm definately been having some weird experiences just on the edges of sleep the last couple weeks. I'm seeing people in great detail I don't know and hearing them speak...beyond that, I'm seeing places they're showing me and other objects and sights. I'm starting to think that my Mediumistic tendancies are coming out whether I want them to or not. I was over at the Witche's house last week and was physically affected by something there - it's always a very LOUD place for me to be - which was identical in nature to something that happened to her only days before. (she is also a Medium, but she does not try to supress it like I've always done) Part of my quest for greater acceptance and understanding of myself has made me aware of these tendancies and talents within me and additionally, aware that I can't run and hide from them. It's still kinda creepy to me and it still bothers me a little, but I think that it's important that I try to encourage - not supress - this aspect of me. Because above all else, it is part of me and therefore isn't wrong...
Also, I'm starting to wonder that what I've always referred to as a sort of "empathy" isn't really just a fuzzy telepathy. Thing is that for some reason, I've always discounted telepathy as fiction. (I know, I know...) I've never honestly had much faith in it's real-life existance until recently. Met a couple people who have this talent, have determined that at the very least I can (and do) pick up on directed thoughts, and that I can recognize this talent (now that I've seen it first hand) in others...I also have an odd habit for just "knowing" things about people before they say anything...it's like slowly waking up though...this idea came to me softly and I'm still trying to explore it and see it for what it is and not what I may try to make it. Just intrigues me though since I there are things about me that I'm still really truly learning...it's nice sometimes when you have pleasant things surprise you for once and even nicer still when it's something good about yourself...
Anyway, I'm babbling. I need to run to the bank to get that check in for my car payment. (Good thing too that I got the check from my friend - it's now 3:11pm and haven't heard shit from the agency!) Trying to work out my bill with Time Warner (they say $200, I say $100) so as soon as I get them to agree with me, I'll be getting RoadRunner hooked up again...mmm... I can almost taste it...soon, soon...I can't wait much longer... -m
