The Online Journal Evolution
I was thinking the other day about maintaining a web journal. (blog) People are equal parts facinated with it and confused about it. But I find I like it. I mean, this one's been around for over a year now with other versions having been around the net for the better part of three years. I've already mentioned how it keeps me honest writing it for the public - I can't hide under my own desires to gloss it over. I've also already mentioned how it feels really good to keep a journal; how each entry is a snapshot of my life at that moment in a way that can't be duplicated. Memories fade, emotions change, but your words remain locked in stone forever.
So recently, I've gotten to thinking about the stages of an online journal. When you first start, it's all new and exciting. It's fun to write simply for the novilty of having it out in public. (almost like a bit of reverse voyarism) The first time you check your stats and you see someone else has actually been there, it really hits you: it's out there and people are seeing it.
The next big step is someone commenting or emailing you about something you wrote. It's especially cool when it's something you didn't mention in any other format to someone and yet they mention it to you - then you know they're reading your journal. It's a warm fuzzy kinda moment. It takes you off guard and yet makes you feel important somehow.
Then comes the days that you learn someone you actually know is reading your journal. It's really weird then. Suddenly it's not just people online or someone you just kinda know as a screen name, now it's real. It could be a friend, someone you went to school with, or - gods forbid - a parent/in-law or a coworker. Then you start to panic. You wonder if your writing integrity is compromised with this knowledge; if you need to find someone else more private to rant. Afterall, didn't last week you just go off on said person in your journal? Surely you didn't know they were reading, but still.... *eep* Panic sets in. What happened to the lovely freedom of writing a journal?
Here's the part most people lose the nerve or see the dead end of the public journal idea. But not me. I hear someone is now (or has been before) reading my journal and sure, I panic for a moment, but then I move on and write my entry anyway. Why? Because no matter what, it's still my space. It is my journal. Public or not, I don't need to hide from the words I want to say. If someone doesn't like what I say, they don't have to read my words. Let me tell you though, a good way to get to know someone - to really listen to them is to read what they write. It's a secret key inside a person's mind. Is it for everyone? No. It takes either a lot of guts or a lot of stupidity (maybe both) to throw your words out there like that; to reveal your life and your thoughts to anyone who wants to read it. But it's not just a one-way street. The writer gets something out of it as well. We get the chance to paint a world for the reader; to be a guide through our lives - be they mundane or exciting. We, as writers, get to show you depths most don't get to see and most important, we get to give you the gift of our words.
So, when you stumble on the journal of someone you enjoy reading, drop them a note. Afterall, we may write for ourselves, but that doesn't mean we don't still get that thrill from seeing someone's reading it.
~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream
at 3/6/2002 04:44:01 PM ~
~
