Friday - picked up a tree, set it up to give Mika a chance to get used to it.
Saturday - Spent the day at a very ritzy mall with my Love and friend Rand. Got to try a sample of the ultra-exclusive G Collection by Godiva (by invitation only) Put our name on the waiting list for an order since they are only available in like eight places around the country and were supposed to run through Valentine's day, but are already selling out. Luxury? Certainly. But one of those once-in-a-lifetime kinda things that doubles as a great xmas gift! :)
Then we came home to get ready for my Love's company xmas party. It's a fancy afair down at one of the nice resorts on the beach. Well, turns out the city was having some kind of parade thingy and we sat for about 45 minutes in a parking lot, trying to reach the beach. We never made it. So, him in a suit, me in an evening dress, decided to head over to our favorite Chinese resturant and have some dinner. (By this time it was going on 8pm and there was supposed to be dinner at the party) We don't often get over there because it's kinda far from where we live. It was fun and silly being so overdressed, but we enjoyed ourselves anyway.
When we got home, my Love and I decorated the tree late into the night while watching Lilo and Stitch. It was a nice ending to a nice night.
Sunday - My Love and I spent the day together by ourselves, running out to pick up some kitty food, hitting Michael's and then the Super Target. We also stopped by Peir One and found a couple things that will make nice, but inexpensive gifts for xmas (we've not gotten anything and will pretty much be buying things the day before xmas since he gets paid the day after xmas and we'll need to write checks that, thanks to the holiday, won't clear until we can get the money in the account. Nothing like waiting until the last minute, but when you don't have anything to spend, that's the way you have to do it.
I wasn't feeling well last night though. To the point that my Love told me I looked ill and he suggested that I take the day off for Monday. He never suggests things like that, though he was right. I fell asleep on the couch at about midnight and he put me to bed shortly after.
Monday - I called in this morning and slept in until about 10am. Though, all day I've been dozing off and generally just not gfeeling up to par. My head's been pounding all day with this tight, constricting pressure around my skull, coming on so hard at moments that I have to stop and freeze because I feel like I'm going to collapse from it. It's not like a migraine, it's just something else and I don't know what it is. My pulse pounds in my head when this happens and I see flashes of blinding white light - as if a camera flash went off right in front of my face - which obscures everything else for a second and leaves an after-image just the same as a physical flash would. Though, there's no flash, I've been here alone all day and the light must be a trick of my eyes or brain. It's not pleasent, whatever it is and it's not helped me feel any better today. Everything is slightly off-kilter today or maybe I am, but either way, I'm not meshing in with the reality around me the way I normally do and the way that's natural. It's different then other times I've gone out of sync with reality - an odd, but re-occuring event which I've never been able to fully express in words - because this time, I feel different. I wonder if my body is attempting to adjust to these changes and it's causing my sickness. Hrm.
My stomach's been unhappy with me today as well which doesn't help with my overall feeling of being ill. I keep feeling like I want to sleep, but I've done that on-and-off all day today and it never makes me feel better. I don't know what would or when this malise will pass, but it feels - from here, at this moment in time - that it's on-going or longer term. I really feel like I'm attempting to adjust to a new environment but I've not moved or changed. I don't know though, something is definately happening and I have thoughts and hints as to what it is, though I'm hesitent to get into it here as it gets deep into thoughts on the nature of reality, what one would call magick, and the essance of existance. Lofty and complicated subjects that I can only grasp my personal understanding in small ways, which become near impossible to explain to another. I think though, that something is happening. And that this is only the beginning. I think I'm changing and that my scope of vision is changing as well. Things are out of focus now, but small sections seem to snap! almost physically into place. I've been drifting, but I don't think I'll have that luxury for much longer. Hrm...so much to say, so few words to say it and even fewer souls to understand.
Anway, enough for now.
~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream
at 12/15/2003 06:17:08 PM ~
~
