given.eyes.to.see dot com | the ever changing status of m v6.0: spring in bloom

Remember that whole had a good day yesterday thing? Yeah, well to fucking hell with that today. My Love's coming home and doesn't even make it like a block before white smoke just starts pouring out the exhaust. Couple months ago we were having problems with overheating and we kept having to put antifreeze in it, and the problem never went away, we just kept dealing with it sometimes overheating and tried not to drive it anywhere. Today, we had to call AAA out to tow it and the mechanic who picked it up said it looked like a head gasket. Joy of fucking joys. This is like a $750+ repair. This was also something that was done when we first got the car because there was a recall on this exact problem on the '95 Mustang. But, seeing as that was done like over three years ago, I seriously doubt they'll still warentee the work at this point.

Here's the problem. We now have no car. My friend Jef said he'll lend us his so my Love can get to work tomorrow, but we're looking at either paying rent or getting our only mode of transportation fixed. Yeah, this is so fucked up. $735 for the rent (due tomorrow, if not, we'll rack up about $200 in late fees the first day it's past due) or at least about $750 (that's a rough estimate, they won't know until tomorrow) to fix the car and only enough to pay one. With no more income available for two more weeks (and of course that income needs to go to things like power and phone and pesky bills like that).

Fuck fuck fuck. Why can't I get a break? Pay rent or fix our only working vehicle (that is the only way for my Love to get to and from the only source of income)? Lovely choices aren't they? I fucking hate my life, it's so not fair.

~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream at 4/3/2003 06:33:19 PM ~ ~

Holy crap! It's really been almost a year since I started giveneyestosee.com? Really? Wow. I just got a 30-day notice of domain expiration in my inbox. Seems I need to renew before May 1st. Blah. Now I need to put aside $15 some time between then and now. Eep.

~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream at 4/3/2003 02:28:20 PM ~ ~

Had a nice day yesterday though I didn't think I would. It was my sister's birthday and my mom called me a couple days before to ask if I wanted to get together with them for a lunch. My sister ended up deciding she wanted to spend the day outside since she really enjoys being out and doesn't get to often. So, she picks the location of a small little county park/beach. This is exactly the kind of thing I don't like to do normally - I am hyper sun sensitive and have suffered 2nd degree burns from 20 minutes in the sun here - and, a day like yesterday when I was full-out with cramps and backpain, hanging out at a beach seemed like hell.

Well, first, the weather turned out to be really nice. It was in the upper 70's and we stayed under a pavilion the whole time and was cool enough in the shade that I put on a long-sleeved shirt over my tee and shorts. Second, the two Alieve and two Motrin (which I took a couple hours apart) kept me relatively pain-free. Third, the ladies room was surprisingly clean and close by. Fourth, we just had a nice time. My mom picked up me up, we ran to her place to get the food and cake and met them there like 3pm. (We were over an hour late.) We had sandwiches and then cake and my sister opened her presents. I took a bunch of pictures and my mom pulled out her video camera. My mom, my sister, my mom's mom (who we call "Nanny" instead of grandmother), my sister's best friend and I made up the group. We laughed and talked and just generally had a nice afternoon.

Before we left, my mom took us to this boardwalk which runs along the non-beachy area of the little key and across the natural preserve area. It was really quite pretty. At the end of the walk is a little covered look-out which oversees the water. My mom took this picture of me standing leaning against the railing:

click pic for larger version

The rest of the shots I took of the scenery - which was actually really pretty - can be found here: A Day at the Beach (page1) and here: A Day at the Beach (page2).

After we left the beach, my sister opted to drive me back home so I got to ride in her new Miata (which is so cute) and even though the sun was setting and the air was really nippy, we drove with the top down anyway. We stopped at her house first and she gave me like a dozen lipsticks and lipstick liners (she sells Avon stuff on the side and had ordered tons of things over the last couple months that just didn't look in person like they did in the catalogue, and she hadn't used them and wasn't going to, so I made out!) and then we headed back in time for her to give a quick visit with Kush-ka, then head out in time for my Love and I to watch the new episode of West Wing.

It was a pretty nice day. :)

~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream at 4/3/2003 02:13:58 PM ~ ~

Gods, I'm so bored!

There's a ton of things I could, should and actually want to do, but I'm stuck in that rut of being so bored and mindnumb that I can't even bring myself to start doing any of them, and instead sit here being miserable, bored and the list getting longer instead of shorter. In no particular order, here's things that need doing:

-- ~~take a shower (clothes and towel are sitting in the bathroom, waiting for me to stop mindlessly sitting at my pc)~~

-- finish my logo for the jewelery site and get it digitally colored and formatted

-- start working on the design and layout for the site (the subdomain's installed but there's nothing there yet! Phoenixfire Designs) and publish the thing!

-- ~~finish and mail out the postcards I've been working on for postcardx all weekend long~~

-- finish (or start a new one, whatever) an overhaul design for the journal here and get rid of the fucking ugly temporary holder deign it's on now which wasn't supposed to last for more then a week or so and for which I hate right now

-- ~~call the apartment complex and get them to fix the dishwasher so I can wash dishes again (we have NONE clean)~~

-- ~~clean up the front room (as always) again and vacuum again like I do every day~~

-- ~~work on some bead ideas with the beads I got like two weeks ago now~~

-- work on some horn ideas with the Scultpey I got yesterday

-- redo my cam page so I don't have to manually update it all the time so I might actually use it more then once a month

-- try to figure my way through installing the damned "dating" script for my forum so I can get rid of the classified board

-- finally list the old games I've been wanting to sell on ebay for like three months now

-- work on updating my Love's new art domain and getting something more then a holder page there

-- figuring out the cost of getting business cards printed for him; getting his logo in print-appropriate format; ordering them

-- research and understand syncing of databases in ACT! 2000 so I can figure out a solution to keeping a current database between two pc's and a laptop

-- check my town in Animal Crossing seeing as it's been like week since I loaded it and it's a real-time based game

-- help redesign Jef's site for him and get it ready for his comic strip instead

That's what I can think of easily off the top of my head. I'm sure there's more. Ugh. I'm going to go shower now. I'll worry about the rest later. I hate being too busy and still being bored and unable to get anything done. Sucks. Can you say depression? I knew that you could.

*grumbles*

[edit] Gotten a lot done haven't I? (/sarcasm)

~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream at 3/31/2003 02:00:07 PM ~ ~