Sheesh. I was sure that everyone would be powerless to resist the cuteness of Mika in the last post and be forced to comment. Maaaan, tough house.
Bored. Mopping. Generally feeling blah and like I've been waiting for something to happen that now I wonder if it's past me by and I didn't notice. I don't know what exactly I feel like I've missed, but it's clear that I have. Like I've fallen asleep and woken up somewhere different and I don't remember how I got here. Or why. Or what to do next. Most of all I feel like I don't know how to get back home.
It's like I'm just killing time. Watching it tick by but it's all just water down a drain. Going nowhere, just repeating the same motions over and over. Isn't a definition of insanity doing the same thing but expecting a different result? So what does it mean when I wake up and think for a moment that perhaps today, today the outcome might just change?
I dunno. But I'm low. And bummed out. And stifflingly bored. And yet too worn down by it to really care or do anything about it. Not that I have options really, but I've given up even pondering them. Hurts less if I just let the clock tick by without really expecting anything to get change, let alone get better. So down the drain it all goes. Heedless of me and all pointless anyway.
~ flowers bloom near Memory and Dream
at 6/16/2004 04:49:50 PM ~
~
