Q: What ways are available to stop annoying northern mockingbirds from singing all night and keeping me awake?

A:This is certainly my most popular question, and it makes up anywhere from twenty-five to fifty percent of all e-mail queries I receive. The simple answer is essentially nothing. Mockingbirds (Mimus polyglottos) are protected by federal law under the Migratory Bird Act, prohibiting homeowners, no matter how frustrated and sleep-deprived, from harming them in any way. As a result, the possibilities for control become drastically reduced, as do the available options for neighborhoods inhabited by this persistently problematic bird.

Mockingbirds are quite common, and are about the size of a blue jay, with white patches in the wings and tail and a mostly grayish body. They have been known to mimic jackhammers, car horns, and even the rings of some cell phones! These birds are not only known for their unusual repertoire but for the time it takes them to sing it. There are thousands of people who suffer many sleepless nights because of a mockingbird singing relentlessly outside their windows all through the night.

As far as stopping the bird itself from singing, there's little hope. Some people will literally throw shoes at "mockers" to get them to shut up, but it rarely works. Some people might be inclined to turn on a light to scare off the noisy vocalists, but reports from others who have tried this indicate that mockingbirds might actually be attracted to such excess illumination! If you put out foods for birds, you may want to stop feeding certain items, like grape jelly, mealworms, or raisins (their favorite feeder food). Also, if you have any fruit-bearing bushes or trees in the yard (mockingbirds have a thing for berries, particularly cherries), you could consider harvesting the fruit, covering the shrubs up with bird netting, or simply getting rid of them. Beyond that, your only hope may be to don some earplugs, close the windows, and try to tolerate the Mimidae symphony.

Here's a quick list of suggestions for steps you can take to quiet down your backyard at night:

* Turn off the lights and close the windows. As aforementioned, some people say that mockingbirds may actually be attracted to porchlights or other sources of nighttime illumination; as a result, it may be wise to shut off outdoor lamps for a few evenings. As far as closing windows goes, I suspect most people have already considered this alternative, but for those who haven't it's by far the easiest one. You may very well have to sacrifice the comfort of a gentle evening breeze on a stifling summer evening to muffle the sound of the mockingbirds. While closing your windows won't chase off the birds, it should at least dampen their songs' piercing effects. And besides, you can always invest in a fan if closing your windows makes your room uncomfortable.

* Chase the bird away physically. This one isn't a permanent solution, but if you really need sleep it should suffice for a few nights. You can go out yourself, or you could use a dog or cat to scare off the mockingbird. Just be sure any dogs or cats kept outside are restrained or contained, and have adequate food, water, and shelter; also, make sure you follow all local ordinances regarding pets and their care.

* Contact a local nature center or wild bird supply store. Often, local specialists will have the most useful ideas about discouraging the presence of certain birds in the area. Topography, geography, and climate specific to your county, city, or even backyard may be important factors in determining the best courses of action to take, and people around you who are familiar with such features are the best ones to ask.

* Wait. Mockingbirds sing to establish and defend territories, so the strength and duration of their vocalizations will vary with the seasons. In all likelihood, the bird will stop singing or move on before long. Just remember that you can't prematurely end the breeding season of a particular bird by destroying or relocating its nest or eggs; this is illegal.

* Try to tolerate the songs. Some will say the song of the mockingbird is beautiful, and indeed, the bird's varied and expansive repertoire offers as many soothing and intriguing melodies as harsh and annoying ones. Learning to pick out the more desirable subtleties of a mockingbird's song is probably a skill that requires a great deal of experience and patience, but the reward for tuning one's ears to the brighter sounds is a relaxing, good night's sleep.